The Fire Comes Before the Crown
Hi, if you’re new here, I’m Alex. I’m not your typical pageant girl.
I wasn’t raised in pageants. I’m not blonde. I’m not a size zero. And my life hasn’t been particularly polished or well put together. In fact, I was 36 when I entered in my first beauty pageant. Don’t get me wrong, I was fascinated by pageantry as a kid. It was a tradition to watch the Miss USA pageant on TV with my mom and grandmother. We were mesmerized by their beauty and poise. We loved picking our favorites and seeing them make it to the end. Entering a pageant as a grown adult wasn’t something I went looking for. Rather, it was an opportunity presented to me that I didn’t think made sense at first. I thought to myself: Do adults compete in pageants?! Turns out…THEY ABSOLUTELY DO! Who knew?! Certainly not me.
At first, I was intrigued and flattered that someone thought I should enter. I thought dressing up and taking pictures and getting glam would be oh so fun. There’s still that little girl inside me that loves to play dress up! As I seriously considered the idea of entering a pageant, I asked God if this was something I should do. And then it became a spiritual choice.
I sensed God saying to me: “This isn’t a decision of will you enter the pageant or not. This is a decision of will you be a woman who makes decisions based on faith or will make life decisions based on fear? It hit me hard and suddenly this pageant was just an option - it was an act of obedience. It was a calling that God brought to me and I got to choose to obey or shrink.
Faith says: “Why not?! Have Fun! Who cares what happens! It’ll be a new experience! Plus you can share your faith and teen mom to entrepreneur story with women learning to ditch fear and walk in purpose!”
Fear says: “What if I lose? What if it’s expensive? What if it’s time consuming? What will other people think of an adult entering a pageant?”
That’s when God gently nudged me and asked: Which voice will win? Which voice will guide your life? Are you a woman of faith or a woman of fear? After that, entering the pageant wasn’t just for fun, it was an act of obedience that I did NOT see coming! But I was down the adventure and meeting the woman I would become on the other side of this new experience.
And spoiler alert: It was so worth it.
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MOST SEE THE CROWN BUT FEW SEE THE FIRE THAT PREPARED ME FOR IT
How the process feels: THE FURNACE
Refinement often happens through trials, discipline or seasons of adversity meant to test and purify your faith.
The GOAL
Like a refiner skimming dross off melting silver, God uses these experiences to strip away what hinders you leaving behind a faith that is pure, tested and genuine.
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THE WOMAN AFTER THE FIRE
The refined woman no longer fears rejection or the opinions of man. She is sure of herself and her God and uses her gifts and voice to walk in alignment to his calling for her life. She knows her worth, honors her boundaries and pours into others. This woman can speak on stages and be visible on social media. This woman can say no when necessary and makes decisions WITH God and not by her flesh. THAT GIRL has been refined by fire. That girl walks in the benefits of refinement: Joy, peace, steadfastness, unshakeable, planted. A leader. Our areas of pain often point to our area of leadership.
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WHAT FIRE IS SHAPING YOU?
FAITH + TRUST
Our faith and trust are the foundation of our identity in Christ. This is the place from where every thought, belief and action flow. God wants our whole heart and then he gently begins to mold our lives into his image and will.
CHARACTER + VIRTUES
A strong identity in Christ produces a prayer life and a relationship with Jesus that makes us WANT to live with integrity and walk in obedience to his will for our lives. The bible says you will know a follower of Jesus by their fruit: Joy, peace, love, patience, gentleness, faithfulness, goodness and self control.
MOTIVES + DESIRES
On our quest to live a life of purpose, it’s easy for our own desires and motives to take a front seat. When those desires are more important than God himself or His will for us, there is an imbalance. This is where pruning can often take place to correct the first place priority in your life.
THOUGHT LIFE + RELATIONSHIPS
Our thoughts become our words and our words become our actions and our actions create our life. It’s imperitive that we learn to take our thoughts captive and obedient to Christ to keep us anchored to truth and to keep us in peace. Our relationships should draw us nearer to God, never pulling us away from him.
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GOD ALREADY SEES YOU AS HIS PRIZED POSSESSION
Isaiah 61:3
...to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of
mourning, and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
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